When last I left you I had battled evil forces in Branson. But I was not prepared for even darker forces that waited for me...in Graceland. *dun dun dun*

June 20th, 2007 8:00 am

I spent the night in my car. I haven't had a beer in two days. I'm starting to feel it.

When I arrived at Graceland I wasn't sure where to start...clearly if someone as boring and lackluster as Kaman was in charge of the outing then they had to have gone on a tour. But which one? Elvis after dark? The Auto museum? I was so confused. And then I remembered something I had heard on the travel channel: Graceland has a wedding chapel in the woods! Noooo! All of my greatest fears rushed past me at once...had she married Kaman in the Graceland chapel???

A check of the guest book calmed me down. No, no they had not. With Mandy no where in sight and no clues to be found, I marked Graceland in the loss column and went on my way.

Unsure of where to go next I decided to take my time leaving Graceland. There was a lot to be seen after all and I’m sure Mandy was in no real danger (especially no real sexy danger) I might as well take my time and see the sights. I mean, how often do I hang out at Elvis’ house? Not often enough friend! As I was strolling past the hall of jumpsuits I remembered I hadn’t checked my email in over 24 hours and it hit me! I have access to all of Mandy's finances online!

One day at my house she left her facebook open on my computer. From there I was not only able to send hilarious messages to people on her friends list, I was also able to hack into her bank account. Maybe I can find where she's been by looking at her bank statement just like they do on the TV crime dramas...

I found a computer and it worked! Plane tickets had been purchased (you'd think he would've bought the tickets but that's where you would be wrong, moron) and they were headed to...

ANTARCTICA!

Labels: adventures, chris kaman, flirtin' with disaster, mandy's one true love, mandy's sexiness, where in the world is mandy sandiego