AKA Christmas Ape.
Most of us know his story by now. (I too would expose my true identity but I hate to risk my lucrative career at Uncle Wayne's Chicken Shack and my weekend gig at Flashdancer) But that isn't why he got picked. #1 He's a Steeler's fan so that was enough for Mandy, #2 he looks really freakin' cute in that picture. And that is enough for me.
He has a nice jaw, I wonder if he knows how to use it...
We'd be happy to offer him a job here, of course the pay is low (Read: Non-existent), you won't actually have anything to do, but there are benefits. Sexy benefits.
Mandy and I require oiled up massages every hour on the hour, and we can't write this sexy stuff without inspiration. Also, we're too lazy to do our weekly breast cancer checks, that would fall to you as well. I need someone to make sure the keg is constantly full and Mandy needs someone to make sure the box of wine always has a full bladder.
It's a dirty job, but someone has to do it. And we're looking at you Mr. Tunison.
Labels: make it work, panty creamer
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